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Charisma had always been a 'party girl', she never took life seriously up until now. She met the love of her life in college, but that was all ripped away from her when his life was taken in a car crash after a particularly crazy night out on the town. But that was three years ago, she has now finally picked up the pieces of her shattered heart and is attempting to get on with her life - One day at a time. She knows the pain will never go away, but if she keeps herself busy, she just might be able to live a normal life again, someday.

One day she woke up, looked at herself in the mirror and thought "this isn't living". That day she got out of bed, she took a shower for the first time in 3 months, she got dressed in something other than pajamas for the first time since her loves funeral, she did her hair and makeup, and got into her car for the long trip to visit her sister, Fiona.

Fiona had been there for Charisma for the first year after his death. Charisma did not welcome the company though, she wanted nothing more than to be alone. Fiona refused to leave though, she knew deep down that her baby sister needed her. But after a year of her sisters constant crying, screaming in her sleep, and refusing any help...Fiona knew Char needed professional help. Fiona left and went back to her farm, but had a nurse sent to check on Charisma three times a week.

So when Charisma showed up on Fiona's door, all 'dolled up' and looking like she was ready to stand on a street corner all night, Fiona knew something had changed in Char, she was coming back to her normal self. So Fiona would do ANYTHING to help her continue with her healing process in any way she could. Charisma may have looked like her old self again, but she wasn't acting like herself. Something inside her had snapped, she wasn't all about partying anymore, she wasn't a hopeless romantic, she wasn't the same outgoing person she once was. She told Fiona she wanted to help out at the Estate. It was half hers too, afterall. Fiona couldn't believe what she was hearing, Char had never had any interest in the horses at all. "Extra Large, Filthy, Disgusting Varments" was the nickname Char had had for horses when they were teenagers. Since Fiona had just hired on Amelia and Jebidiah, she really had nowhere to put Charisma to work. So she decided to expand the farm! And that is where the Clydesdales come in.

Fiona chose Clydesdales for a specific reason...They are one of the largest horse breeds, yet also one of the gentlest. They will help Charisma see that horses are wonderful creatures, and just because they are intimidating in size, they can still be extremely tame and wonderful lifelong friends. Fiona had a new lot built specifically for Char and her Clydes. The barn is connected to the house, so Charisma cannot get away from the horses, nor can she forget to take care of them. If Char begins to slip back into her depression, the horses will be right there to help her through it. Caring for horses can be a very healing experience, so Fiona has high hopes for Charisma.

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Charisma arrived at her new home, she was greeted by an old friend, Tabitha, whom she never really liked...


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Charisma is excited to be starting her "new" life... hopefully she can overcome her heartache. Things look promising. :)

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She spends some time getting to know her new dog, Spike.

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When you're all alone with your thoughts, your mind can be your own worst enemy at times...

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So to take her mind off of things, she had a little photoshoot with herself...This may just work out :)
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And cuddled her new foal, Blossom!
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PART TWO

After Charisma had been at Hidden Hills for a few months, she decided it was time to confront her pain - right at the source. When Damon died, his family all agreed that Charisma should get his ashes, Charisma was weary about it but decided she wasn't ready to say good bye yet, and packed 'him' away in a chest and hadn't opened it since.

She slowly made her way into the spare room that housed what was left of the man she loved. She stared at the chest for about an hour before even opening it. She stood there trying to gain enough courage to face reality. As she stood there, she began to think about all the wonderful times she shared with him. The time he surprised her after her final exams with a bouquet of roses outside her class, and praised her for a job well done and told her he 'just knew' she had aced it. The night she came home from her graveyard shift at the book store and he was waiting on the front porch of their house, with a candle lit dinner under the stars. 'What a perfect night,' she thought to herself. And then the look on his face as he stared at her in the passenger seat, right before that pickup truck slammed into the drivers side door....

Tears welled up in her eyes, and she shook her head, trying to forget that image. But it was seared into her memory. It was the last time she saw him alive, how could she forget that look? She couldn't... He had no idea what was about to happen to them, and he looked so happy, smiling at her like he was seeing the only woman who would ever make him complete.

"Stop it Charisma! That was a long time ago! Remember what Dr. Meyer said... one day at a time", she said out loud to herself as she reached down to open the chest.

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It took all of her mental strength not to walk away, but she did it. The chest creaked open, and she peeked inside at the urn and wondered how a whole human being could even fit in that little jar... She wiped the cobwebs from the urn before lifting it out. She walked over to one of the guest beds and sat down with the urn on her lap, and wept.

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She laid down and took a nap, with her love wrapped tight in her arms. She dreamt of him, as she always did.

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She dreamt that he was still alive, that he had not wanted to be with her anymore so he faked his death. Everyone but her knew about it, until she ran into him at the mall and saw him with another woman. Her chest felt like it was caving in on her from the pain, and she sat up panting, trying to catch her breath as she looked at the urn laying on the ground and realized that it wasn't real, he was gone, and she was never going to see him again.

She looked at the clock and realized she was going to be late for her new job that night. She had just gotten hired on at a local pub to serve some drinks, she had been practicing her mixology lessons all week for this, she didnt want to be late. So she rushed off, leaving the urn on the floor.

If she had only stayed home for 5 more minutes, she wouldn't have believed what she saw. A yellowish/red smoke began to rise from the urn as a translucent figure began to form.

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All night at work Charisma was thinking about her boyfriends remains lying on the floor in the spare room. It was tearing her up inside that she just disgarded him in her sleep like that, and then left for work without even picking him up.

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So when she returned home at 3 am, the first thing she did was run into the spare room to pick up his urn....but it wasn't there. She searched under the bed, thinking maybe it rolled under there. She got down on her hands and knees and peered under the bed, but there was nothing under there besides some old shoe boxes full of pictures. She pulled a box out, and sat on the floor shuffling through old pictures of her and Damon. She found one that she liked and went and sat on the couch and watched some reality TV to take her mind off of things. When her show was over, she was too tired to get up and go to her bedroom, so she decided to just sleep where she was.

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The next morning, she went to put the picture of Damon on her desk in the office, and almost fainted at what she saw in the doorway. What looked like Damon, but see-through, was standing there, holding a bouquet of roses. He looked just as he did that day outside of her Psychology class after her test. She couldn't help herself, she cried out, wishing she would wake herself up, she was sick of these horrible dreams about him! But when she didn't wake up...she realized that what she was seeing, was real.

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Did I really just tear up at your story? Why yes I did actually!

Oh you finally read it? xD